Take Me Under
by KorranHalcyon
Summary: (KOTOR II) As the crew of the Ebonhawk break up, the Exile begins to wander the galaxy again. Except one thing stands in his way. On the way to Telos the Handmaiden admits her love for him, now he must ask himself if he loves her back.
1. Heart

The Ebonhawk shot through hyperspace for what seemed forever. To Darius Gennings, things could get boring within the duration of ten hours. Mostly he spent it speaking with Kreia, his mentor whom he had killed. The young Jedi had gone over one-thousand times, through gritted teeth.

"It. isn't. my. fault." He told himself, groggily as he sat in the Crew Quarters.

Suddenly he felt something, the presence of… Atton. The Exile looked up to see the scoundrel standing against the doorframe, a blank expression masking his usual smug look. "You know, I haven't been able to focus on my piloting for the past hours we left Malachor!" His face was turning red. "What is it with you and your vibes? I've been feeling them for the past ten hours!"

"What are you talking about?" Darius asked innocently.

Atton crossed his arms. "Don't give me that, your emotion have been streaming off you like the stench of Nal Hutta."

Darius sighed. "Sorry Atton. It's just that-" The scoundrel cut him off. "Kreia is dead and your blaming yourself right? I know I well uhm, sorta' miss the Old Witch also. No offense." He added embarrassed.

"Thought you wanted to drop her off on the nearest star after Telos?"

Atton grinned hands up defensively. "Hey, just saying that I'm gonna miss the "imbecile" and "fool" remarks."

While Atton was smiling, Darius frowned inward and outward. "… I don't want to talk about it." The Jedi said weakly. "Just drop it."

Atton lofted an eyebrow. "Whatever, just trying to cheer up our favorite Jedi friend. Now if you don't mind, I'll get back to piloting." With that said he turned around with a mumbled, "If I can concentrate."

Darius watched him leave following his trail into the Starboard room few minutes later. "This will probably be the last time I see this place." He said with a sigh.

He sat down and sensed the ship. Reaching out with his feelings, the Exile felt the Cargohold as the Handmaiden did her training and lastly Bao-Dur who was fixing the circuitry (Like always). Below their calmed composure he could sense something else… loss.

For Bao-Dur it was his remote, his most prized possession since boyhood. That and everyone else, Mandalore, Mira, T3… they had all gone their separate ways.

Soon Bao-Dur would be gone to Telos with Mira and Atton and the Handmaiden, he didn't know about them. This raised even more questions in his overwhelmed mind. He clenched his eyes shut doing his best not to feel anything else.

When this failed he stood up and continued to pace the ship. 'Perhaps I'll drop by the Cargohold.' He thought between the screaming questions in his mind.

"Breanna." He said, nodding to the training Handmaiden.

"Exile." She nodded back.

The Jedi sighed. "You can call me Darius you know." He offered.

"Oh, yes." She said, his warm-blue eyes gazing deeply into hers. He noticed she returned his gaze.

"I have been wondering," She said. "If you are alright. You seem to be distant lately. Your closing yourself off from all of us lately." He noted the worried tone in her voice.

"I'm fine." He was lying through his teeth and she knew it.

"Your not." She retorted. "I can see pain written all over your face. Your sad and I know why. It's Kreia."

Darius sighed and decided to resign himself to the answer. "Yea."

She nodded at him in understanding. He remembered that Echani never spoke through words, only through actions yet he had no idea what action would recognize this type of emotion.

"Listen Exile, I want to tell you this because… you need to know." Her voice trailed off into a whisper. "This is hard to say so I want you to listen and not say a thing." She closed her eyes for a moment, but opened them to gaze passionately into this. This made him slightly uncomfortable. "I know you better then I know anyone else. And I… I think that being with you in battle have made my feelings on this more clear.

"I fought side by side with you on Dxun and was rescued by you on Telos. Through this whole journey, ever since I met you I always considered the thought that the compassion you show might have a hidden motivation but now I know I am wrong. You showed me the Jedi path, you taught me to listen to the Force. When I'm with you Exile, time itself feels so slow. And I thank you for this, because when I stand with you, I listen to my heart and now it is telling me one thing."

'You love me…' Darius though, now completely overtaken by emotion. He would do nothing until he got her answer. He watched as she shifted her feet uncomfortably.

"… I love you." She finished.

He knew this was bound to happen. He knew that they were bound to fall for each other from the beginning. Part of him did not want to face it.

"_Do I love her back?" _

Slowly he stepped out of the Cargohold to consider this. He needed to know what was in his heart.


	2. Vortex

Darius sat in the Starboard room officially caught in his head nothing around him made sense. She loved him, yet he didn't know if he loved back, if he could love back. He had loved one person in his past but that was a long time ago. Now he had learned that loving was something that… that he couldn't do.

"_Why is everything so hard lately?" _He asked himself, slapping a hand to his forehead. _"It doesn't need to be so hard."_ Something else told him.

"How?" He mouthed.

The Jedi laid his head back, hand covering his face caught up in his thick locks of brown hair. All he wanted to do now was sleep so that Exile reclined in his seat and decided not to think about it…

Suddenly the ship lurched forward pulling him out of a near rest. He sighed in discontentment. "Atton! What was that?" He yelled over into the cockpit hall.

"Did I mention that there's an asteroids belt on the north side of Citadel Station? Better hold on tight!" The Scoundrel yelled back.

Darius let out an annoyed sound before walking into the Cockpit and taking the copilot's seat. "How long does this set out?" He asked, turning his attention to the window outside him.

Atton shrugged, not looking up from the navi-computer. "Well, considering this is Telos and we fought a war here a good few hours ago there's gonna be a good amount of debris flying at ya'… after we clear ten miles of asteroid." He ended his last phrase mumbling.

Darius slapped his hand to his head again. Along with the burden of heavy thoughts, now he had to deal with peril on what he thought was going to be a peaceful trip. "Our luck just keeps getting better." He mumbled.

Atton cocked his head but thought better of it and got back to piloting. Jolts upon jolts followed the ship. Darius kept an unblinking gaze on the belt, doing his best to sense any oncoming danger for Atton and the crew's sake. "I'm going to the Starboard room." He said at last, deciding that the scoundrel (Though he wasn't that confident) could take care of things on the Piloting front.

"Suite yourself I got things covered up here."

Darius nodded and yawned. The Jedi paced the ship again like he usually did. He trapped himself in his thoughts again.

"Brianna… I don't know." He said alas after five minutes of contemplating.

He knew this would happen, there was not one doubt in his mind that she would end up falling in love with him. However he didn't know if he could say the same about himself.

She was beautiful and had a kind heart yet there never was such an attachment for him.

"Just when you think things are less complicated," His hand covered his face as he walked into the Crew Quarters, doing his best to ignore the Cargohold. "… The get harder."

This was true, painfully true. Just when he thought there were no more secrets he didn't know, a big one comes out and confuses the day lights out of him. Then when he sits in resolve and tries to quietly figure it out, the Ebonhawk gets caught in an asteroid belt.

"I want to love her…" He said breathily. "But I can't."

"_Jedi to love, to love a Jedi now that is a new sentiment." _He thought amused, his eyes fixed on the nearest wall.

He smirked inwardly. Oh how Vrook would love to criticize him another step if he had heard of this confession. "I'd never hear the end of it."

With that he stood up, almost falling on his face as the ship lurched forward and the lights flickered and dimmed. Darius looked around confused. Staggering to his feet, and keeping his hand on the wall, the Exile swaggered towards the cockpit.

"Atton!" He yelled now that the lights kept dimming and the ship kept jolting. "What the hell is going on?"

Atton shook his head violently. "I don't know! I got this transmission and some ship started firing on us. Suddenly, the fight ended and the flaming systems are shutting down!" He pounded his fist into the command board.

Darius slapped a hand to his forehead and nodded silently to himself. This journey just kept getting better and better. "What happens now." He asked in a forced calm.

The scoundrel shrugged. "Beats me." His voice was half a mumble.

"We need to shut off all the power." Someone said from behind him.

Darius knew who it was. He turned around and sighed, his eyes locking with Brianna's for a second. _"I knew I couldn't avoid her." _

He wrinkled his face in concentration, the lights were flashing against the windows and portholes so he had relatively no idea what was going on. _"Best listen to her." _He thought, resigning the ship to that idea.

"Alright Atton, do as she says. Any attacker won't trace us down well in the middle of the Tel-" His sentence was cut short by a horrifying realization.

Electricity swirled around the dashboard and the lights flickered dead one last time. The emergency signals stopped and the lights died away. The command board exploded. Earning and utterly pissed expression from Atton. "Oh Forceing Damnit!"

Darius sighed but turned around as the dark space of the ship was suddenly illuminated and the dead silence filled with the humming and illumination of a red lightsaber…


	3. Duplicity

"Who are you?" Darius asked, stepping forward to the red blade.

The breathing of the enemy was as if a wild lion was attacking so deep was his breath and his face barely feasible as the red glow slightly illuminated his masked face.

"I… come… for you." His voice was ragged along with the rasping of his breath.

Darius looked confused his hand fell onto his saber. The Jedi grasped it, unlocking it from his saber bring it up in his hand. "Come for me… why?" Now he was even more confused.

"To… bring you… Revan."

His saber fell from his hand at this. Darius's eyes popped open wide and his voice was barely a firm one. His Adams Apple felt stuck in his throat and beads of sweat formed on his paling face. "I am-am, n-n-n-n-ot Revan."

"But you shall… meet him." The Assassin responded swinging his saber at the Exile.

Darius ducked as the bloody red saber came slicing at him. He rolled behind his new-found enemy, grabbing his saber. Landing on his feet, the Jedi ignited the silver blade, now two colors illuminated the pitch black ship.

Darius circled his opponent, holding his hands in a firm stance. He looked over to Atton and the Handmaiden who were both dumbfounded about it. "Both of you," He yelled meeting another side slash from the Assassin. "Get out of here!"

The Jedi upper slashed, occupying the blade, made a ginger hook to the ribs of the enemy. He looked over his shoulder, they were still standing there only Atton had his Mandolorian Ripper drawn and the Handmaiden her usual Echani stance. "I said go! This one is too powerful!"

"We won't leave you!" Brianna yelled, her hand over her heart.

He didn't even respond to that. Darius was blown backwards into a wall by a powerful wave of Force energy, the Assassin's saber searing through his boot to his foot.

By the time he hit the wall, he was plunged into darkness…

(Atton's POV)

I had to do something! Darius was our friend, well maybe sometimes the greatest schutta in the galaxy but heck, a friend still. "Prepare yourself Master Schutta!" I yelled, holding down the trigger of the Mandolorian gun shooting a swirling ball of energy into the Sith's chest.

I looked sideways at the Handmaiden, what the hell is she still standing there for? I thought she'd be at our Jedi's side within a moment. But no, the moron is sitting there ready to tear this guy's head off. "If your gonna fight, do something!" I yelled at her.

"I am preparing myself Atton. We must control ourselves." What an eye-roller that one. I mean, who cares about a boring lecture when we have Sleeps With Vibroblades in our face? I don't.

"Cut the lecture and lets get to work!"

"You… will die." Yea, yea assassin, big talk. Keep talking while I rip your head off.

Could barely make out his face or where he was, his black robe blended in with the pitch black ship. The only thing that can make nasal's face apparent is his flaming saber which I am bit preoccupied with at the moment. How do I get myself into this stuff?

(Darius's Author POV)

His head was swimming as he laid on the cold, steel floor of the ship. Darius forced his eyes open, his ribs feeling cracked as he tried to stand up. He couldn't. The Jedi rolled over (Painfully if I may add) onto his back, his body shaking with pain. He reached out with a quivering hand towards his saber which disignited for modified safety purposes first thing it left his designated grip.

"Uh." He moaned, not even heard by his companions. His ears were ringing from the continuous blaster fire and his leg was in pain as it was burnt.

"_I'll save them." He thought pain stricken_

He reached out grabbed the wall, legs almost giving out as he stood up. Darius flopped against the wall, closing his eyes as sweat dripped down his face. The Jedi gathered the Force into his hand, focusing it as a swirling blue energy…

Suddenly it felt like something burning was trailing up his veins. A bright flow, ever growing with every moment passing gathered into his gloved palm. The Jedi supported his hand, releasing a powerful wave of Force lightening at the Sith's head.

"Agh!" Suddenly, the cold of the ragged breathing stopped but that wasn't enough before Darius fainted and the assassin's cold, dead body fell to the deck. Good think Atton and the Handmaiden were on board to support him…

"Come to me Jedi." Someone sneered. Darius rose at command of the voice. He looked around at the stormy, rocky terrain which he knew as –

"_Malachor." The word quivered on his lips, and his soul was as is dead in this dank world. "Who calls me?" He yelled, now on his feet and looking around confusedly. _

_And then there was silence, only broken by a force of lightening and the crack of thunder. The voice's words still echoed all over… Malachor. _

"_Surely you would remember the call of your Commander." And now he knew. _

_It felt as if a ton of bricks had fallen into his stomach. If he wasn't caught up in his head, he would have passed out long ago. Darius blinked as sweat purred profusely from his face. _

"_Revan…" And that word was ushered out in such and icy, hissing noise that only the snake would understand… "Betrayal…" _


	4. Resolve

Darius awoke in a pained state. He felt as if his head was swimming in a pool of molten carbonite. He forced his eyes open, his headache considerably worsening as the lights hit him in the eyes. He moved his head (in much pain) to see Atton and Brianna sleeping in chairs next to his bed. "Why?" He mouthed to himself.

Why did she loved him so much? Yet when he stood with her, his heart was moved with emotion and he felt this sense of calm and peace. "Because I love her…" His voice was weak.

The Jedi stood up, staggering to his feet. Next to his bed were his black Sith Robes, (Not that he was a Sith, he just liked to use them) and his saber on top of them. Collecting them, he pulled them over his jumpsuit and stood up knees wobbling.

"_How could Bao-Dur sleep through all of this?" _ He asked himself.

He shrugged off the feeling and walked into the cockpit. Sure enough, the Irodonian was placing spikes and components into the core and blow-torching the wires. Darius limped over to him, clasping his hands behind his back. 

Bao-Dur looked up from his work and smiled. "Take it easy. I woke up and found you in the medical bay. I will suggest that you keep your lighstsaber on safety." He figured he was trying to throw some humor into the moment.

Darius gave him a half hearted smile, rubbing his ribs which he figured were broken. "I'll note that." He said quietly.

It was obvious the Irodonian was uncomfortable with the silence. "So, where are Atton and the Handmaiden."

Darius sighed lofting both eyebrows irritated. "Sleep. In the medical bay."

He nodded and went back to his work. Darius didn't mind, he wasn't in a chatting mood as it was. He limped away to the Starboard room, observing the map. They were floating in space right before Telos. His guess was that he was stuck in the ship for another good day or two.

The Jed sighed, slumping forward in his chair, grasping both his sides. He grunted in pain as his ribs painfully contracted. He began to sweat his breath becoming ragged for a moment. He breathed a sigh of relief as the pain passed.

"Do I really love her?" He asked himself. "I feel something, no doubt."

"_Yes, I truly… love her."_ He mind was completely made up, he really did love her. But he couldn't bring her with him where he was going…

"I will follow in your footsteps Commander." He said, head hanging gulping slightly. "And then we will fight the Sith and finally end this conflict for good."

"That's the spirit." Something whispered deeply. Oddly enough it sounded like Kreia. Darius heaved and laid back contentedly. It felt as if a deep weight had been lifted. Now all he wanted to do was sleep…

"Run Darius!" That voice was familiar. The Jedi ran through a jungle, the sound of gunshots and cries of pain filled the air as the jungle behind him exploded in flames.

"We can't hold them off, I'll call for reinforcements!" Darius yelled back stopping for a few moments. "Delta Squad, go back and relieve the Rogues, move out! Keep it sharp boys!" He commanded to the troops following closely.

"Yes, General!" The all said in unison.

He turned around, bursting through the flames, ignited his saber to meet the bolts of energy being fired at him. The Jedi gathered the Force around him, making it explode around him, pushing back the Mandolorians.

"Commander, that's the first wave. I don't have enough energy to stop the second!" He yelled to a black cloaked figure.

"Very good General. Hold your position, we will separate and meet back at camp after you have secured the forest area!"

"Yes Commander Revan!" He said, saluting.

The Jedi turned to the company around him, emotion of fear and hurt in their eyes. Darius met their gazes as they circled around him. He paced the circle. "Alright boys, you heard Revan! You need to focus. And remember, it doesn't matter to me if you win or lose, but do you remember who you came here for? The Republic, that's right. If we fall today we have forsaken her, the ones we love and so on!

"But we cannot fall! If we do, we fail all of them and every sacrifice our allies, every death means nothing if we fail, here on Dxun!" Just then, a battalion of troops encamped around them. Darius raised his saber. "For the Republic!"  
Gun shots rung and his saber hummed as triumph came to them that day…

"Exile, wake up." Someone said, shaking him. Darius opened his eyes groggily, sweating profusely from his nightmare. She dabbed his face gently with a cloth.

"I'm up." He said grumpily. He stood up, grasping his ribs having to sit down from the staggering pain. He gnashed his teeth and closed his eyes. "You shouldn't have left the Medical Bay in your condition." She said in her usual business voice.

Darius smiled slightly. It was good that she was not falling all over him at the moment. "Yea, sorry about that. I just hate staying in one place at once." He opened his eyes and locked his gaze on hers.

He stood up one more time and walked away from the chair, towering over her. She followed him down the hall to the Crew Quarters where he spent most of his time lately.

Once inside the small Quarters, Darius looked around depression hitting him again. "Just when I thought it was going up." He mumbled to himself, turning around to look at the Handmaiden.

Pain was very much audible in his eyes as the Knight stared passionately into her warm, blue eyes. "You told me something earlier today." He said, his voice so soft and full of emotion it could move a mountain.

"And I meant it." She said her voice with the same compassion.

"I was confused for a long time. And I… I was afraid when that Sith came on board. I was afraid that I- that I would lose you." He said, gulping. He smiled and looked at his feet. "And now I want to tell you this… I love you as well."

Now everything made sense. It all fell into place as he said those words. He couldn't take it anymore, Darius stepped forward and embraced, not dare letting go. Everything was so in the moment as he rocked her gently in his arms, resting his head on hers.

She hugged him back, forgetting that she was squeezing the death out of his broken ribs. He smiled as he felt her head rest on his toned chest, relaxing into his arms. "I love you." He whispered.

She pulled away form him and looked into his eyes. "I know." And for the first time, they kissed passionately not noticing a certain scoundrel smirking outside the door.

"'Bout time." Atton mumbled to himself, laughing.


	5. Abscond

The last hour he was on the Ebonhawk went away like rain on the mountain. Darius and Brianna talked to each other forever in the Crew Quarters while Atton and Bao-Dur worked on the Hyperdrive.

And at last it was time for him to part ways. Such a thing was so hard to do. The Jedi reclined in the Starboard room, listening for Atton and his message. "Hey," The Scoundrel said quietly. "Were on Telos."

Darius sighed and nodded. "Very good."

This would be the last time he would see or ride the Ebonhawk. The Jedi stood up, bowed his head walked into the Main Hold. He called Atton, Bao-Dur and Brianna through their Force Bonds.

The three stood at attention in front of the Exile, Darius smiled at his friends emotion deep in his eyes. "I came here," He began slowly. "To give you my last command."

It was obvious none of them understood what he meant. _"Idiots." _He thought bitterly. The Jedi sighed as Bao-Dur spoke up. "We do not understand General. Last command?"

"You are correct. I have decided… to follow Revan, once more." He noticed the enthusiasm on their faces. It broke his heart to say this, especially to Brianna. "But I can't take any of you with me."

Now the brightness in their eyes dimmed at his words. Atton cleared his throat and stepped forward towards him. "Who's going to pilot the Ebonhawk?"

Bao-Dur said nothing as tears streamed down Brianna's face. His heart burned with pain to see her in tears. Darius walked up to her and embraced her, but she pushed away. "Leave me alone." She said sadly, running to the Cargo Hold.

The Jedi sighed and looked at Bao-Dur and Atton who bore a look of shock. "I need to go and see her." He said, throwing his hands up.

"Brianna." He said compassionately as he walked towards her, slumped down on the ground and crying her heart out.

"Leave me alone!" She yelled at him.

Darius touched her shoulder but all the same she recoiled from his touch. "Please don't cry and make my leaving harder than it is." He whispered.

She shook her head, not paying attention to a word he said. Heaving his chest, the Jedi squatted next to her and held her. She didn't fight to get away from his arms, she just rested in them and put her head on his chest still sobbing.

Darius rubbed his back in a circular motion. _"This is so hard."_

Hold me even though I know your leaving

_And show me all the reasons you would stay._

_It's just enough to feel your breath on mine_

_To warm my soul and ease my life._

_You've gotta hole in me show me now._

He closed his eyes, not dare letting go. He stood up with her, her arms around his neck. There was passion, meaning and love between the two and their hearts entwined in each others. Darius broke away.

"I have to go." He whispered. "And I don't want you to cry." He wiped a few tears out of her eyes. "Be strong."

With that he left, going back to the Main Hold for Atton and Bao-Dur who were just chatting nicely. "Welcome back." Atton said sadly.

"This is our parting of way. So before I go, I want to give you these." He dug into the pocket of his robes, pulling out fifteen-thousand credits giving each of them five-thousand. "I want each of you to swear to me that you will help those who need your help and rebuild the Jedi order. Go to the Polar Region and use Atris's academy. She is waiting for you." 

They docked in Citadel Station, the three of them walked out of the ship and went to the Cantina to celebrate together. They each played each other in Pazaak, had some Tarisian Ale spoke of their experiences, past and their hopes for the future.

It wasn't like usual that Darius would open up like this but it was necessary. This was the last time, possibly forever that he would see those three again. "In the future," Atton said cocking his head. "I don't know. I'll probably just do what our buddy said." He slapped Darius on the back who grinned. "Just rebuild the Jedi Order."

The rest agreed to do the same. "I'm going after Revan." Darius said quietly. "He needs my help to defeat the true Sith."

"Still going on your own?" Atton asked hopefully.

Darius nodded sheepishly. He didn't want another outburst that had happened on their way to the Cantina. They were begging to follow. "Will we see you again?" Brianna asked.

"I don't know." He didn't want her to get excited and then die in battle.

"Give me four years guys. If I'm not back by then, do as you will. If I'm back in five I will contact you through our bonds and summon you to Telos. We'll meet here."

And so the trio agreed that their parting of ways was final. There was no if ands or buts about it, Darius was going on his own. Seven hours passed and Darius finally decided it was time to go. The Jedi stood up, walking back to the ship. It was a scary thing, to be in the company of his friends for the last time.

He noticed the laughter in their hearts had died out as they walked to the ship. Atton offered another round of Pazaak just to keep him for another day. But he refused.

Once at the ship, Darius walked on the loading ramp and turned back. "I love all of you and when I return, it will be the same."

And with that, the Jedi didn't look back.


End file.
